LostKnightsRPG.org

[Liquidprism]

Last night I took Temple out to eat, and we asked our neigbors where we should go. They recommended an 'upscale' restaurant with 'resonable prices'. So we headed out their directions, and an open mind (one needs such things when seeking food in rural Missouri).
When we got there and I almost missed the turn in, as the signing was bad, and I mistook it for a church. Upon closer inspection I realized that it was in fact an old church building that had been renovated. My hackles rose as we entered.
As we walked inside felt as though I was staring into the face of god, it was terrifying. The whole of the building was decorated with cheribs and precious moments angels. The archways, and floral arragements had not changed since the founding in eighteen-oh-ancient. The only thing it was missing, were the pews.
The little old lady that greeted us was remincent of an elderly organ player/offering taker, during services long past. The lady that waited upon us reminded me of mother superior.
The menu was similarly disturbing in an entirely diffrent fashion. Classic Italian sat along side frog legs, and 'gator' tail, and the resonable prices were actually not so much. I had an epiphany...Jesus had tricked me. He lured me to that place knowing I loved italian food, and set exorbant prices in order to mock me as i funded his cause. Damn you Jesus...damn you. I conceded him the round and moved on.
The most disturbing aspect of the whole experience was having to stare at cherub 'junk' while eating. The food was actually pretty good, and the staff was nice. I think they were pumping subliminal hyms through the intercom, but fortunatly I'm immune.
That pretty much concludes my first 'fine dining' experience here in Missouri. Oh, and I think there is a bit of irony in the fact that Italians are largely Catholic.

[rydi]

if you had asked for the special menu, a midget with fake wings would have given you a blow job. for jesus.

[Liquidprism]

Damn...why didn't I think of that?