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I torch cheyne while he's leaving.

And leave.

Is it a magical torch?

presses a magical button that freezes time and has the magratheons (sp?) reconstruct earth just as it was w/ the guy walking into the bar again

but Bill Nighy, instead of doing that, binds your soul for 100 years to serve him aboard his shellfish boat in the ocean.

Earth is reborn.

And yes, Bill Nighy is able to bind souls to his shellfish boat. It turns out he is actually at war with the reincarnation of Zenon.

But the question we are all waiting to find the answer to is...has Cheyne been burned?
To determine this we need to know if Gideon's fire is magical.

Also we have a slight paradox as 'bar guy' now exists in two places at once. The original drifts toward the sun, and the new one is now presenting himself to all the patrons of a remade bar. Is this perhaps the end of everything?

of course my torch fire is magical, it's also "cheynebane", and is enchanted with work.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!1!!111111


WORK! RUN!

Okay. Sorry Cheyne, but you get a bit toasty. On the plus side there is a whole new planet Earth beneath you. Its a pleasant view...as seen through burning that is.

Burning is a lot like bacon, it makes everything better.

mmmm... bacon sounds good...

I sing josh's "hes still fighting" song, backwards, in spanish, to earth, while crushing fifty seven wolverine fetuses.

We'll see what THIS does!

Well singing the song in that fashion turns out to be a forbidden incantation, which channels the souls of every incarnation of Chuck Norris from all the different dimensions throughout the multi-verse. This energy pours into the fresh stems cells of the crushed mutant fetuses, and gives them the power of life, and soul. Slowly a body is shaped and formed from the mass of living changing tissues and energy.
What emerges is unspeakable. It has no name, and is the ultimate fighting machine. A mantra of sublime Chuck Norris quotes fills the multiverse, and they all come true at once. Everything everywhere at anytime receives a brutal adamantium reinforced roundhouse kick to the face, and everything explodes.

The good news is that the multiple 'bar guy' anomaly that was threatening to wipe out existence has be diverted...with a roundhouse kick to the head. So to have the ninjas waiting in their super secret shadow dimension, and also Cheyne you are no longer on fire.

The bad news is that everything, everywhere, at anytime as received a brutal epic Mortal Combat style finishing move to the dome, and it is all subsequently annihilated (perhaps that word doesn't do the devastation justice, but it will have to suffice). The only thing left standing (or hovering in the void of nothing, as it were) is Chuck Norris himself, newly reborn is the fires of a dying multiverse, forged in the heat of his own rage, with spikey golden hair and a brilliant aura of his own man scent.

And with a twinkle in his eye he says:

"The eyes of the ranger are upon you."